by Ken Tuccio

I’ve been regularly going to the same supermarket for close to 15 years now, and for as long as I can remember there’s been a cashier who works there that looks exactly like Danielle Fishel.

Now, I’m sure a good majority of you are asking yourselves, “Who’s Danielle Fishel?”.

Well, this is Danielle Fishel …

Danielle Fishel is best known for playing Topanga on Boy Meets World, but she’s also starred in both Dorm Daze movies, and currently hosts some clip show on The Style Network.

Most people wouldn’t find it interesting that a cashier that’s worked at a supermarket for over a decade looks exactly like an obscure supporting actress from a 1990’s sitcom, but those people aren’t me. I've been a fan of Danielle Fishel since I was in the 7th grade, and I make no bones about saying that she's one of my obscure celebrity crushes.

Seriously, specifically from grades 9-12 I was really into Danielle Fishel. So much so that if during my High School years Danielle Fishel had asked me to break the kneecaps of Ben Savage, or knock the front teeth out of the mouth of Rider Strong, I would have done it in a heartbeat. Basically, in High School I would have gladly whooped the ass of anyone Danielle Fishel asked me to, unless she asked me to beat up Mr. Turner, because he probably could have kicked my ass.

Anyways, what amazes me about this cashier's similarities to Danielle Fishel is the fact that she has always looked exactly like Danielle Fishel; changes in body size and all.

When I first noticed that this chick looked like Topanga, she was thin and in really good shape; at the time, Danielle Fishel was as well ...

Then, as Boy Meets World neared the end of its run, and we were subject to watching those crappy College episodes where Eric Matthews pledged a fraternity, Danielle Fishel gained weight ...

No, Danielle Fishel wasn't fat by any means, but you can't deny that Danielle became a much chunkier version of Topanga. When this happened, the cashier also packed on the pounds.

On a side note, I'd like to say that I actually think Danielle Fishel looks good with a little meat on her bones, not that it matters.

Anyways, the situation was creepy, especially since she wore the weight just as well as Danielle Fishel did.

In the post-Boy Meets World society that we now live in, her resemblance to Danielle Fishel hasn’t change a bit. She still looks like the spitting image of the chick who once taught Corey how to walk in high heels. Granted, looking like Danielle Fishel in 2008 probably doesn’t get her as much attention as it did during the mid-90’s, but it still beats looking like one of the chicks from Sister, Sister.

The fact that this girl has constantly looked exactly like Danielle Fishel leads me to believe that she’s in some way connected to the Boy Meets World star, much like how Lindsay Lohan’s characters were connected in I Know Who Killed Me.

Yes, I saw I Know Who Killed Me.

You see, in that movie, when something physically happened to one of Lindsay Lohan’s characters, it also happened to the other. Based on the weight fluctuations, and the similarities in aging, I have to believe that this girl has some obscure connection to Danielle Fishel. Basically, when Danielle Fishel gets chubby, she gets chubby. When Danielle Fishel gets thin, she gets thin. So on, and so forth.

Obviously I’m putting far too much thought into this, but the reason I’m doing this is because I somewhat believe that this girl holds a connection to some bizarro-Boy Meets World universe filled with people who look like the sitcom’s characters. I have to assume that this girl regularly hangs out with a dude that looks like Corey, a piece of trailer trash that looks like Shawn, and she probably regularly talks to an old guy that looks like Mr. Feeney.

So, in some weird way, I see this girl as my link to actually hanging out with a dude that looks like Mr. Feeney; something that I think would be insanely cool, especially if he could utter the phrase “Mr. Tuccio” in the same annoyed tone he uttered “Mr. Matthews” in for over a decade.

Yes folks, these are the dreams I have.

I’m well aware that this bizarro-universe theory is something I’m never going to find out the truth of, as I’ll never approach the girl and stir up a conversation. It’s not because I’m intimidated, or because I’m shy, it’s more so because I wouldn’t be able to control myself from spewing out Boy Meets World or Dorm Daze related lines.

I know for a fact that within the first couple of sentences of our conversation I’ll ask this girl about Minkus, or maybe about the black chick that Shawn dated. At some point I’d attempt to discuss the precious stolen jewel that killed the father from The Nanny in the second Dorm Daze, and also ask her whether or not she regretted not “experimenting” with the cute chick that wanted to make out with her in the same movie.

Basically, I’m well aware that any of those conversations will lead to blank stares, awkward pauses, and eventually a restraining order. So, it’s for that reason that I’m not going to strike up a friendship with the Danielle Fishel-looking girl who’s asked me “Paper or plastic?” since the mid-90’s.

Well, that, and the fact that she’s worked as a supermarket cashier for 15 years.

I mean, come on, I’ve got standards.