Thankfully the gigantic hoopla over the death of Michael Jackson has quieted down a bit.

While people are still mourning his death, and listening to his music in tribute, it doesn't seem to be the primary topic of conversation any longer.

I say that because I no longer find my Twitter feed swamped with people Tweeting about how amazing an artist he was, nor do I find myself privy to partaking in daily conversations with people at work who feel the need constantly ask me what my favorite Michael Jackson song or video is; which is very convenient for me, since I normally elicit stares when I tell them I like Man In The Mirror.

Apparently that’s not the most masculine Michael Jackson tune.

Anyways, as is the case when celebrities die, shady people attempt to profit off the death.

When celebrities pass on it’s not uncommon for people to start bootlegging their own merchandise celebrating the celebrities life and work, whatever that may be. It happened several years ago when Ray Charles died, happened more recently when Heath Ledger passed away, and it was even done after Chris Benoit killed his wife and son.

I’m not sure if this speaks to the entrepreneurial nature of our society, or the quick need to make a buck in these tough times, but I’m fairly confident in saying that there are countless people who, upon initially hearing about the death of Michael Jackson, immediately went into Photoshop to do up a quick “RIP” design that they could throw on a CafePress T-Shirt in hopes of garnering some extra cash.

While bootleg tribute merchandise is nothing new, the bootleg Michael Jackson tribute merchandise seems to be much more unique.

I’ve found that the various Michael Jackson bootleg tribute products vary from the absolutely ridiculous, to the downright bizarre. The bootleg MJ merch isn’t limited to iron on T-Shirts, or bumper stickers printed on sticker paper you buy at Staples; nope, his tribute merchandise goes above and beyond those norms.

A prime example would be this gem, which I found on eBay …

This item was billed as a “LIMITED EDITION MICHAEL JACKSON TRIBUTE BILL”, and I assume by “limited edition” the dude selling this means he only prints them from his HP printer one at a time.

I’m not really sure how a counterfit bill bearing the pre-alien-esque face of Michael Jackson pays tribute to his life and music, but then again I’m not that big a Michael Jackson fan.

The dude who created this bill put in some intricate details to make it as unique and “desirable” as possible, for example the cereal number on the bill is MJ06252009, which of course is the day Michael Jackson died. This guy also put the phrase, “Legends Series” in the bottom left hand corner of the bill, causing me to believe that if enough celebrities die I could complete a set of morbid fake money; something that’s been on my bucket list for years.

Whomever created this bill also placed the monetary value at $1,000,000; a mythical figure which I’m sure is meant to indicate the high value of what MJ contributed to this world artistically; either that, or it’s meant to show his monthly debt before his death.

In either situation, this item is stupid, but not as stupid as this …

In the technologically advanced time we live in, where with a 5 second Google search you can find everything from DeLoreans for sale to video of Olivia Munn dressed as a french maid and jumping into a pie, I wouldn’t think it would be that difficult to find photos and video from the Michael Jackson Memorial Service.

Actually, I just did this Google search for such a thing, and amazingly found countless results.

That being said, why anyone would spend $10 on a DVDR slideshow containing images and grainy video from the Michael Jackson Memorial Service is beyond me.

Maybe I'm simply spoiled, having grown up in the era where any images and video I could conceivably want are only a few keystrokes away, but I don’t think I’d ever want to sit down in front of my DVD player to scan through various images of the Michael Jackson Memorial Service.

If I want to find a picture of Mariah Carey singing in front of a corpse, I could go here.

If I want to find images of Michael Jackson’s golden casket, I could click here.

And if I want to see pictures of Danica Patrick in a bikini, I’d go here.

Yeah, that last one has nothing to do with the memorial service, but I simply wanted to see if I could seamlessly transition from a corpse to Danica Patrick in a bikini.

I think I did it well.

Anyhoo, the “selling points” of this compilation is that it contains 56 pictures from the service, and comes complete with a “menu system”, allowing the viewer to go from picture to picture with the click of a remote. Also, as you can see from the picture above, the disc comes decorated with the most low-resolution disc art possible; giving your waste of money the most vintage and retro look you could imagine.

If you’re going to spend your weekend afternoons scanning through pictures of Michael Jackson’s corpse on your HDTV, you’d better be in style while doing it; and as Office Space taught me, “style” means “flare”, and “flare” means “buttons” …

I’ve never met anyone who regularly wears buttons as part of an ensemble.

Sure, when I was 5 or 6 I wore a WWF button that contained the image of The Big Bossman, but that’s because he was a kick-ass prison guard from Cobb County, GA; even then, I stopped wearing the button as soon as I became interested and concerned with the way I looked.

Roughly 9th or 10th grade.

Don’t judge me.

Regardless, this bootleg button is very vague and artistic, as it doesn’t flat out say “RIP Michael Jackson” on it, instead it has a poorly clip-arted version of his trademark hat, and underneath the hat there’s a small blue tear; a tear which is not only supposed to symbolize the sadness many people felt after the passing of MJ, but also reminds America of how awesome the Wii game Dewy’s Adventure is.

Seriously, it’s this generations Kirby.

Like most artistic statements, this button is open for interpretation.

Sure, the most common belief is that this button symbolizes the loss of one of music’s greatest artists, but it could also mean a lot of different things to alot of different people.

This image could also represent the sadness so many comedy fans felt after the release of the unneeded Blues Brothers 2000 sequel close to a decade ago, or it could also represent your fandom for the comic Spy vs Spy, or maybe you want to use it to show how much you appreciate that photoshoot Maria Kanellis did where she wore a Derby.

Whatever your personal feelings toward this button are is irrelevant, because at the end of the day it’s still a horrible waste of $7, much like how this is a horrible waste of $2 …

If you’re wondering what that is, it’s a Michael Jackson cigar case, because I’m sure cigar bars across the country are filled with old Italian men who smoke stogies while discussing how much they love the song Billie Jean.

In terms of ridiculous items no one would ever buy, this one has to top the list.

The description for this item states that you can use this as both a cigar case, but also as “a holder for anything else that fits”; a description that I must admit, is pretty damn honest.

Sure, this bootleg item is pretty generic in design, containing an image of Michael Jackson, complete with the classic, “1958-2009” text in a Times New Roman font, but the stupidity of the item takes away from any artistic merit it may have.

Side note, this has no artistic merit.

If you’re looking to pay tribute to Michael Jackson there are better things you can do than buy bootleg merchandise that nobody will ever be impressed by. You can simply drive around your neighborhood blasting Black or White out of your speakers, or you can buy an officially licensed MJ Tribute T-Shirt. Hell, if you were a big fan, I’d even be fine with it if you did what this dude did and get a charicature of his Thriller zombie tattooed to your person …

... b ut buying crappy dollar bills, ridiculous DVDR compilations, or buttons that even the proudest Chotchkies employee would be embarrassed to wear is not the way to go.

It’s just a waste of money, and if you’ve got money to waste, you might as well go buy Tuccioholic merchandise.

Seriously, go buy Tuccioholic merchandise.